cajunbelle
Daylily Diva
Joined: 04 Jun 2006
Posts: 2934
Location: zone 8b Louisiana (Map)
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| Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 1:16 am Post subject: Does It Ever Stop? |
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Life sure seems busy lately. Mom is getting no better, physically weaker and mentally also. Tonight, even though she saw and heard the shower running and saw me getting all the towels etc together she didn't realize I was trying to get her to go to the shower. She can't remember what she gets phone calls about, or who they are from. I mean, I expected it, but it just seems to progress from day to day lately.
When I get home I have been trying to get some of this stuff planted before it all dies. Tonight I got my barrel planter filled and mostly planted up. I forgot to put two more bricks under it so I will have to wedge something under the sides to make sure it stays stable. Now need to plant something to hang down the side and I need something tall in the center. I am still thinking of doing a cane reed teepee and putting a passion vine in the center.
I have jewelry to make for our Mother/Daughter banquet Saturday night, but am out of glue and forgot to pick some up today. So I will have to do it tomorrow night and Friday night
Oh well, that's life.
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Sharon
Phil. 4:13
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katsback
Showing Great Promise
Joined: 19 Mar 2007
Posts: 445
Location: odessa,MO zone 6
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| Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 1:20 am Post subject: |
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I feel for ya, as my dad has alsheimers too,its just awful,ill be glad for a cure to come soon!!hugs girl,,,
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Calomaar
Deputy's Friend
Joined: 02 Mar 2007
Posts: 604
Location: Land O' Lakes, Wisc. Z - 3b/4a (Map)
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| Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 3:50 am Post subject: |
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Yes it stops, ------- it stopped 3 years ago, ----- I'd give most anything for an hour with her now. It can be sad for some toward the end, It can be sad for some afterward also. I'm sorry, I understand.
Tom - Calomaar
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You brought so much joy, love and happiness into our lives
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Shanna
Showing Great Promise
Joined: 19 May 2006
Posts: 392
Location: Texas (Map)
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| Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 4:20 am Post subject: |
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I am sorry to hear about your mom.Will keep her in my prayers.The teepee with passion vine in center sounds like it would be very neat.If ya make it please show pics.
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glendann
Official Garden Angel
Joined: 19 May 2006
Posts: 6100
Location: Texas (Map)
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| Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 4:27 am Post subject: |
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I understand also Cajunbelle.My mom had her mind up to the end but my dad was another story.God Bless you and like Tom ,I truely miss both of them.
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Live today to the fullest because tomorrow is not promised.
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eileen
Moderator & Resident Taxonomist
 Moderator
Joined: 07 Feb 2005
Posts: 10340
Location: Scotland (Map)
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| Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 11:17 am Post subject: |
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You certainly have your hands full Sharon. It's hard to see a parent deteriorate so quickly isn't it? Sadly it happens to so many - my own mother included - and there is very little we can do apart from be there for them and love them. I'm glad you've managed to get some time to yourself and get out into the garden and get some planting done. I like the teepee idea and the passion vine should look good in the centre.
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cajunbelle
Daylily Diva
Joined: 04 Jun 2006
Posts: 2934
Location: zone 8b Louisiana (Map)
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| Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 11:56 am Post subject: |
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Thanks guys. My only regret with Mom is that I can't be there all the time for her because of work. I know that her time here is short and I want to spend all my time with her, but quitting work is not an option. I would rather have her here, even with all the problems involved, then not have her at all.
Eileen, gardening is my mental therapy. I felt so much better after planting up the barrel, it soothed my nerves and cleared up my cluttered mind a bit.
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Sharon
Phil. 4:13
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toni
Mistress of Garden Junque
Moderator
Joined: 07 Jan 2006
Posts: 4505
Location: North Texas (Map)
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| Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 1:04 pm Post subject: |
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It ended for my dad in 1995, he was 68, when two strokes ended his 'battle' with Alzhiemers, he had begun that journey at the age of 59.
I didn't live close enough to help Mom with him on a daily basis but we went out there every chance we got.
You are a brave and loving daughter.
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jubabe296
Official Garden Fairy
Joined: 18 Mar 2006
Posts: 1180
Location: south central Texas (Map)
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| Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 2:33 pm Post subject: |
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Sharon you are definately in my thoughts! I know how hard it is to take care of your Mom and watch her deteriorate. My Mom didn't have alzheimer's, she had ovarian cancer. I helped my Dad take care of her on a daily basis and it is physically and emotionally exhausting! I would do it all a thousand times over if I could and I'm sure you feel the same way! Hang in there and if you need a shoulder I'm just a pm away!
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dooley
Official Garden Turtle
Joined: 03 Jul 2005
Posts: 3099
Location: Arizona, U.S.A (Map)
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| Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 4:12 pm Post subject: |
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My mom and dad were both sick for a long time and it did influence our move to Arizona. They stayed home until the end. I'm happy we were here and not 2,000 miles away. I'm glad you have gardening to help you through it. Dooley
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Henry Johnson
On The Way Up
Joined: 12 Dec 2006
Posts: 137
Location: Mid-Florida (Map)
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| Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 4:21 pm Post subject: |
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Sharon;
May I add my encouragement and compliments on your handling of the sad serious struggle of dealing with a loved one with mental difficulties. Please note this: I believe (with some clinical/scientific basis) that the mental workings inside the minds of elderly persons are still reasonably good, it's the communications and control signals that get scrambled causing them to seem incoherent. Another way to say it is, when your Mom attempts to say something to you, what comes out of her mouth may not have even a remote resemblance to what her brain/mind attempted to say to you. So, always believe that she knows what is happening and you'll have much less things to beat yourself up over in the future. Hank
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It is better to sit quietly and be thought a fool, than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt!
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Frank
Happy Gardening
Administrator
Joined: 25 Jan 2005
Posts: 8708
Location: Malmö, Sweden
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| Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 5:17 pm Post subject: |
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It's saddening to hear about your Mum Sharon. While I personally have no real experience with this situation my aunt did lose her husband to Alzheimers at a young age. Very sad. You and your Mum have my thoughts.
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Happy Gardening
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Polly
Thumb Gardener
Joined: 26 Jun 2006
Posts: 2235
Location: Michigan
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| Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 8:13 pm Post subject: |
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You are in my thoughts and prayers Sharon. I have no experience with your situation I do know how hard it is to watch your Mother not being able to do the things she did in the past. I lost my mother to heart disease and diabetes just over a year ago and I know how hard it was for us to watch her physical condition deteriorate. I agree that gardening is a good therapy - it has gotten me through a lot both with my Mother's illness and my husband's disability.
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Netty
Chaotic Gardener
Joined: 04 Nov 2006
Posts: 3922
Location: Southern Ontario zone 5
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| Posted: Thu Apr 19, 2007 11:05 pm Post subject: |
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Bless you and your Mom.
Gardening really is the best therapy, isn't it?
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cajunbelle
Daylily Diva
Joined: 04 Jun 2006
Posts: 2934
Location: zone 8b Louisiana (Map)
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| Posted: Fri Apr 20, 2007 1:06 am Post subject: |
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Thanks everyone, I see that y'all are also good therapy. I really appreciate all of the encouragement, thoughts and prayers. Hank, thanks for that insight, I guess I never thought of it that way, it does make sense and helps me to deal with it better. Mom has not been diagnosed with Alzheimers yet, but she does have the beginning signs of dementia. And the bone disease and the physical affects of that make it that much harder on her.
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Sharon
Phil. 4:13
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