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Where my Halloween costume went

Category: Pets and other animals | Posted: Tue Oct 30, 2007 5:54 pm

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Our riding club had a small do with dressage and jumping last spring, and I wanted to participate. But the nerves I had! So I thought up a good idea that would make me feel OK and give the spectators a laugh. I found my carrot/pumpkin costume and started in that.

As you can imagine, the judges put me on last place, deeming me a danger to both myself and others, but I did it, which was the main goal. I even got an extra rosette for being me. After a day at the stables my costume was beyond salvation, and I've never gotten round to making a new one.

This is what it looked like:





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Language problems

Category: Ramblings | Posted: Mon Oct 29, 2007 9:06 pm

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I'm Norwegian in case somebody have missed it. My mother tongue is also Norwegian, and that's the language I think in. Joining a forum where English is the lingua franca is a brave deed in my eyes. Well, I'm normally not one to display bravery and occasionally I wonder if I'm in over my head. Then I comfort myself by reading a bit in a book called «Broken English spoken perfectly» by Stewart Clark. He's nailed some very typical errors foreigners make when trying to communicate in the English language.

English and Norwegian have a lot of words in common, but they don't always mean the same in the two languages. And then there are the grammatical errors. Infinite possibilities of getting things really wrong.

I'll give you an example: «In winter we have pigs in our rubber decks.» Translated: «In winter we use car tires with metal studs in them.» English pig is Norwegian stud or spike. English deck is Norwegian tire.

A classic is the phrase «Of course you can sleep with me.» No, that's not what it means! It means «Of course you can sleep over at my place.»

The late Swedish Prime Minister Olof Palme had to cancel a press conference. The reason given was «he's got a very bad influence.» Meaning the flu... And when it comes to fairs or religious cermons, we call them a messe. So if somebody foreign thanks you for the mess, that's probably not what they really mean.

Nobody beats SAS when it comes to toilet signs: «Do not put foreign bodies into the lavatory.» And the Norwegian coastal steamer has its own specialty: «Do not throw strange things in the toilet». In Swedish or Norwegian it makes sense, but I think something got lost in the translation.

Also, we tend to have a rather strange pronounciation, so you won't be sure whether we mean moose, mouse or mousse. And are those black things in the mulled wine raisins or Russians? Did he say beer or bear? Is a pot plant exactly that or just a misspelled potted plant?

The worst of it all is that we think we're right. So please don't mock too much if I make the occasional error, will you?

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Cultural heritage

Category: Ramblings | Posted: Mon Oct 29, 2007 10:42 am

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The Vikings appeared out of nowhere in 793 when they attacked and sacked the Lindisfarne Monastery. Then they spread out, and are suddenly found all over Europe.

Dublin, for example, was the seat of Norse kings. They were a power to be reckoned with from 841 to 1014 when the legendary Brian of Boruma finally broke their hold of Ireland.

In France a big, strapping chap from my part of Norway decided to settle and make himself a kingdom in Normandie. History knows him as Rollo. We call him Walking Rolf. It is said he was too big for any horse. He was the great-great-great-grandfather of William the Conquerer who ruled England from 1066 until 1087.

William managed to beat the Saxon king Harald II Godwinsson in the Battle of Hastings in October 1066. Harald II was the great-great-grandson of Harald Blåtann, the first official Danish king. He also ruled parts of Norway.

Lots of Vikings went eastwards, up the big Russian rivers and far inland to plunder and trade. Others went south, and we know that the King of Constantinople had Vikings in his army. One even went on a crusade to Jerusalem, the first European king to do so, Sigurd I Magnusson also known (in Norwegian) as Sigurd Jorsalfare. He died in 1130. With all this coming and going, the Norse were quite up-to-date on what was going on in the world.

The Vikings also fought a lot among themselves. The Swedish and Danish were at it for centuries. The Norwegians were too busy with internal squabble to bother about the others. As Christian beliefs took hold, so the fighting and blood-shed stopped too. The sea-faring peoples of the north took to trade, which was far more lucrative and a lot less dangerous.

And from then on until far into the 1800s we really didn't do anything very exciting. This is probably why when I say «Norwegian» people think «Viking».

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Historical facts

Category: Ramblings | Posted: Sun Oct 28, 2007 2:52 pm

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... are boring! I dislike the way historians recite years page up and page down. They have finely tuned the art of making history uninteresting to anybody but themselves. But some numbers need reciting.

The Black Plague reached Norway in 1349 and killed 65% of the population, which wasn't very big to begin with. From the remains a strange community slowly grew, but nothing really exciting happened for centuries.

Around 1800 the Norwegians started looking for the real Norwegian way of life. The National Romantics collected Norwegian stories, made Norwegian music and painted Norwegian paintings. The music of Ole Bull and Edvard Grieg and the paintings of Tidemand and Gude are still tresured. The focus was all on the Norwegian farmer. The Danish King Frederik VI lost Norway to Sweden in 1814, but he forgot to return Greenland, a fact we still dislike him for.

Whilst under Swedish government the Norwegians were still trying to find out who they really were. The speech and grammar had been Danish, but now a movement to find the Norwegian language started to surface. Thanks to a chap called Ivar Aasen Norwegians have two official languages; Norwegian, which sound and writes a lot like Danish, and New Norwegian based on dialects all over the country, which the Swedish understand quite good in writing. When Aasen published his book in 1848 he started a language fight that is still very much alive, and all school children suffer under it.

When tearing ourselves loose from Sweden in 1905, we lost the areas called Jämtland and Härjedalen, and we still bear a grudge toward the Swedes for that. And we dived wholeheartedly into the art of being Norwegians. We didn't notice WWI much because we declared ourselves neutral and got to keep Svalbard because of that. Thank heavens!

Things took a real turn for the better after WWII, when our industry started growing and the welfare state was built. Being a hard working, proud people with no time for airs and graces, we've slowly built a system that is very equalitarian and built on trust. The taxes are quite high, but we all benefit from them at some point in our lives, so even though we all complain about them, we're not really making an effort to get rid of them. And now we've got time for airs and graces too.

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Anemone sorely missed

Category: Garden | Posted: Sat Oct 27, 2007 5:27 pm

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When spring arrives again, I'll get to meet my Anemone x lipsiensis. It's a cross between A. nemorosa and A. ranuncloides. I really like the pale yellow colour:



And the Anemone blanda will show too:





I wonder where the Euphorbia will have self-seeded next year. This one found a strange place to live:



The red Rhododendron "Nova Zembla" puts on a show in the beginning of May:



How I miss them.

Last edited: Sat Oct 27, 2007 5:27 pm

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Why we love them so much

Category: Ramblings | Posted: Sat Oct 27, 2007 11:17 am

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How come a modern society like Norway keep a Royal house? Why, indeed. Norway was under Danish and Swedish rule for centuries, albeit we had a large degree of self-government. Finally, in 1905, we cut ourselves loose, removed the Swedish herring salad from our flag and started to build our own government.

And the Norwegian people wanted a King. Not any old King, mind, but someone with the proper ancestry. So we fetched Prince Carl from Denmark. He didn't want to come until the Norwegian people had voted, and Monarchy won with 79%. He changed his name to Haakon VII and moved here with his wife Maude from the English Royal house, and his small son, our future King Olav V.

The Swedish Royalty are mere upstarts compared to the rest of the European royals. Jean Baptiste Bernadotte was a Pontecorvo, France noble and one of Napoleon's generals. He ruled Sweden under the name Karl XIV Johan from 1818. One of their descendants became King Haakon's mother, so even the Swedish connection was in order.

King Haakon VII went wholeheartedly in for Norway, and his actions during WWII endeared him to all, even the staunchest anti-royalist. When he passed away, his son Olav had big shoes to fill.

He proceeded to do so admirably. He was wont to walk around with no sight of security guarding him. He boarded the tram to go skiing during the petrol crisis in the -70's, and insisted on paying his fare like everybody else. When visiting the USA he complained about the restrictions given him by the security people. « At home I don't need security guards, I've got four million of them!» When he passed away the Norwegian people flooded the Castle Square with candles, flowers, poems, drawings and other tokens of the loss we all felt. A totally un-Norwegian behaviour.

Our present king, Harald V, was very humble when taking up his work. He is overshadowed by two giants, but we watch him grow every year. He's both royal, human and humane. He's also very busy. Whenever Norway wants to send someone to some do or other, but don't rightly know who to send, we send the Royals. They're not political, but they are respected and open doors everywhere. And they're not too expensive to keep. They are ours, we elected them and most of us want to keep them!

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More spring favourites

Category: Garden | Posted: Fri Oct 26, 2007 7:20 am

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I am not only looking forward to primroses in spring. I also like it when the Omphalodes verna starts:



And these are called "Texas". My husband saved them from a ditch:



The irises are also nice:





These are small ones, but there's nothing small about their flowers.


Last edited: Fri Oct 26, 2007 7:21 am

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How nice to be popular

Category: Ramblings | Posted: Thu Oct 25, 2007 4:57 pm

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Since joining the Stew I've noticed that our collective knowledge and money are very sought-after. I've had a giggle or two at some very obvious and not-so-obvious tries at snaring us, and I've felt sadness at some of the more veiled attempts.

The good thing is that the admin-mod-team very quickly take action and remove unwanted advertising. The bad thing is that when new people register, I've started wondering whether this is a genuine Stewbee or another scammer.

Being hopelessly naive, I always believe that people are fair-minded, and I get my nose punched over and over. Ah, well, maybe I should learn to be more of a sceptic, even if I don't want to.

Then it suddenly occured to me: Maybe the same thoughts were applied to me when I registered? Yikes!

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Norway's most important laws

Category: Ramblings | Posted: Wed Oct 24, 2007 7:19 pm

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No, it's not what you think. I'm not starting legal classes here. ;-)

There are two laws that Norwegians live by. Bet you've never heard of the Law of Jante. Well, it goes like this:

1.You shall not believe that you are somebody.
2.You shall not believe that you are as worthy as us.
3.You shall not believe that you are any wiser than us.
4.You shall not imagine that you are any better than us.
5.You shall not believe that you know anything more than us.
6.You shall not believe that you are more than us.
7.You shall not believe that you are good at anything.
8.You shall not laugh at us.
9.You shall not believe that anyone cares about you!
10.You shall not believe that you can teach us anything!

This Law first appeared in writing in a novel by the Danish writer Axel Sandemose. He made up a small community called Jante, but all small Scandinavian communities might be called that, because you'll mainly find the law applied by the sceptical people living in them. The law has made many a talented person into a mediochre one, and unfortunately it still prevails in some areas. Norwegians living by this law like things to be well done, but please don't brag about it. Then you'll summarily be cut down to size. We've been trying to kill the mentality for ages, but so far with little or no success.

The second Law comes from Norwegian writer Thorbjørn Egner, who made up a community called Cardamom Town, where nothing bad ever happens, even though they have three robbers living there. Here it is:

You shall not bother others,
you shall be both fair and kind,
and whatever else you do I do not mind.

Egner wrote many books for children, and his Cardamom Town is built in our largest zoo/pleasure park in Kristiansand, southern Norway. This book is also published in English.

Last edited: Wed Oct 24, 2007 7:20 pm

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The Norwegian way

Category: Ramblings | Posted: Tue Oct 23, 2007 7:21 pm

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Being a Norwegian is being different. We're 4,7 million people on 385,000 square km, which gives each Norwegian 12 square km to play on. In other words Norway is very full of absolutely nothing except Christmas trees and granite.

Norway is so long that if we flip it around, Finnmark will end up in southern Italy. And it's so narrow in places that one can easily walk from the fjord bottom to Sweden. The roads are indescribably bad and wind up and down mountains and in and out of fjords.

Norway's contribution to the World is Henrik Ibsen, Liv Ullmann, the word Quisling and the Nobel Peace Price. Oh, and Thor Heyerdahl of course, and Arne Næss, the late husband of Diana Ross.

Our closest neighbours the Swedes and Danes get severe cultural shock when they move here. The Dutch on the other hand, flock here to get away from the crowds in their flat, overpopulated country. The English find us so alien that every now and then they write a bestseller about us. I do believe most buyers are Norwegians, though, since we take so much pride in being different.

Despite the fact that we are so few, Norwegians are found all over the globe, also in very remote corners. In Seattle one can manage well without knowing any English I'm told. All Norwegians have a bit English, even though some deny it. Most also speak a bit German, Spanish or French. Some even Russian and Chinese. We have to, being so totally outnumbered.

We got rid of our nobility in the 17th and 18th century, but still elected a King in 1905. Our monarchy is still going strong, being very modern. Our Crown Prince married a single mother some years back.

We've got oil, furniture manufacturing, ship wharfs, fish, forest and a lot of high technology and visionary research. We've got very few snobs. We're allowed to tell our boss he's being an ass if that is a fact. We care nothing for titles. We don't care who you are, we judge you from what you do. If you do your stuff well, then we'll respect you. Norwegian women are so self-sufficient that Norwegian men are lucky if they catch one. Most Norwegians marry, but stand by their partner only as long as their partner stands by them. Divorce rates are sky high, since both men and women have career jobs. But the children always come first, so new parents get 12 months' leave with pay and share this time among themselves. Usually the parent with the best paid job takes the shortest leave.

Norwegians are very good at moving abroad, but also good at moving back home, because we firmly believe that despite weather conditions and government turmoil, this is the best place to be.

Last edited: Tue Oct 23, 2007 7:21 pm

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