Georgia State Troopers rock! :)

Discussion in 'Jokes and Games' started by Ronni, Jul 2, 2017.

  1. Ronni

    Ronni Hardy Maple

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    These are actual comments made by Georgia State Troopers that were taken off their car videos:

    1. "You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you just went through."

    2. "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch after you wear them a while."

    3. "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document." (My Favorite)

    4. "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

    5. "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the speed of the bullet that will be chasing you." (LOVE IT)

    6. "You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?"

    7. "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?"

    8. "Warning! You want a warning? O.K, I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."

    9. "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

    10. "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey poop."

    11. "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."

    12. "In God we trust; all others we run through NCIC." ( National Crime Information Center )

    13. "Just how big were those 'two beers' you say you had?"

    14. "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we can."

    15. "I'm glad to hear that the Chief (of Police) is a personal friend of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail."

    AND THE WINNER IS....

    16. "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign here."
     
  2. marlingardener

    marlingardener Happy

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    A dear friend and neighbor is a retired Texas state trooper. Now I understand where he got his wicked sense of humor! He has told me, "If you don't laugh, you cry a lot."
    While we are calling people "heroes" we ought to include those law enforcement officers who go out every day and face the public.
     
  3. mart

    mart Strong Ash

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    Love those answers,, would have liked to be a fly on the wall for #16 ! Bet that was an interesting conversation.
     
  4. eileen

    eileen Resident Taxonomist Staff Member Moderator Plants Contributor

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    Oh I love those!! Just my type of humour.
     
  5. Odif

    Odif Young Pine

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    I know someone who once told a police officer, after jumping a red light, when asked by the officer if they knew it was a red light, she told the officer that there was a bit of green in every colour. She got let off.
     

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