Norwegians and temperatures

Discussion in 'Jokes and Games' started by Droopy, Feb 3, 2008.

  1. Droopy

    Droopy Slug Slaughterer Plants Contributor

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    This went around a few years back. Don't take all of it literally:

    +15 deg C This is as warm as it gets in Norway, so we'll start here. People in Spain wear winter-coats and gloves. The Norwegians are out in the sun, getting a tan.

    +10 deg C The French are trying in vain to start their central heating. The Norwegians plant flowers in their gardens.

    +5 deg C Italian cars won't start. The Norwegians are cruising in cabriolets.

    0 deg C Distilled water freezes. The water in Oslo Fjord gets a little thicker.

    -5 deg C People in California almost freeze to death. The Norwegians have their final barbecue before winter.

    -10 deg C The Brits start heating their houses. The Norwegians start using long sleeves.

    -15 deg C The Aussies flee from Mallorca. The Norwegians end their Midsummer celebrations. Autumn is here.

    -20 deg C People in Greece die from the cold and disappear from the face of the earth. The Norwegians start drying their laundry indoors.

    -30 deg C Paris start cracking from the cold. The Norwegians stand in line at the hotdog stands.

    -50 deg C Polar bears start evacuating the North Pole. The Norwegian army postpones their winter survival training awaiting real winter weather.

    -70 deg C Santa moves south. The Norwegian army goes out on winter survival training.

    -183 deg C Microbes in food don't survive. The Norwegian cows complain that the farmers' hands are cold.

    -273 deg C All atom and subatomic particles movement halts. The Norwegians start saying "Faen, its cold outside today."
     
  2. eileen

    eileen Resident Taxonomist Staff Member Moderator Plants Contributor

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    :smt005 :smt005 :smt005 Sounds a lot like one we have here about us Scots!!!
     
  3. Palm Tree

    Palm Tree Young Pine

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    Ha ha hehehehe

    I especially like the Italian car pun.

    And at 5 degrees I would probable live, eat and sleep in front of the fireplace.
     
  4. Sjoerd

    Sjoerd Mighty Oak

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    What a funny thing.
    I have to smile at these sorts of things everytime. clever.
    Thanks for the post
     



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  5. Biita

    Biita Arctic-ally Challenged Forager

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    hahahahha,,, omg!!! fy faen,,, how true is that,,, (comming from the artic here)

    we had a great laugh over that, an kept saying to each other,,,jepp, jepp, shaking our heads and agreeing with each one we read.

    What even funnier is have 2 rugs hanging out under the porch shed drying,,,, hahahaha,,(hey the sun hits there) ain't nothing like freeze dried.
     
  6. kaseylib

    kaseylib Young Pine

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    We've adapted your version for us here in Wisconsin US. Here's our version (in F):

    WISCONSINTES ARE A TOUGH BUNCH...

    60 above zero: Floridians turn on the heat. People in Wisconsin plant gardens.
    50 above zero: Californians shiver uncontrollably. People in Wisconsin sunbathe.
    40 above zero: Italian and English cars won't start. People in Wisconsin drive with the windows down.
    32 above zero: Distilled water freezes. The water in Wisconsin gets thicker.
    20 above zero: Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats. People in Wisconsin throw on a flannel shirt.
    15 above zero: New York landlords finally turn up the heat. People in Wisconsin have the last cookout before it gets cold.
    Zero: People in Miami all die. Wisconsinites close the windows.
    10 below zero: Californians fly away to Mexico. People in Wisconsin get out their winter coats.
    25 below zero: Hollywood disintegrates. The Girl Scouts in Wisconsin are selling cookies door to door.
    40 below zero: Washington, D.C. runs out of hot air. People in Wisconsin let the dogs sleep indoors.
    100 below zero: Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. Wisconsinites get upset because they can't start the mini-van.
    460 below zero: All atomic motion stops (absolute zero on the Kelvin scale.) People in Wisconsin start saying... "Cold 'nuff fer ya?''
    500 below zero: Hell freezes over. Wisconsin public schools will open two hours late.
     
  7. Droopy

    Droopy Slug Slaughterer Plants Contributor

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    :D I can tell all hardy folks have their own version of this! Love some of your points kaseylib.
     
  8. Biita

    Biita Arctic-ally Challenged Forager

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    hahahaha thats funny Kasey,,, well i have been saying wisconsin is alot like up here.. very close.
     
  9. glendann

    glendann Official Garden Angel

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    If its 55 and windy in Texas its cold but come visit us in the Summer late July or August and see how you from the cold fairs.:)
     
  10. Palm Tree

    Palm Tree Young Pine

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    Gosh

    I have to concede defeat here. :D
    I am a bit of a Californian in this case.
     
  11. Droopy

    Droopy Slug Slaughterer Plants Contributor

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    You'd probably find me in your deep freezer. :D
     
  12. Biita

    Biita Arctic-ally Challenged Forager

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    lol,, i would be a puddle in the middle of the yard.
     
  13. jungseed

    jungseed Seedling

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    Guess this just goes to show there are alot of us Norwegians in Wisconsin.
     
  14. Droopy

    Droopy Slug Slaughterer Plants Contributor

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    From what I've heard there are more Norwegians in the US than in Norway.
     
  15. jungseed

    jungseed Seedling

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    I would believe that - most of the people in the mid-west seem to be some part Norwegian.
     

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