It's been a minute y'all, since I really posted what's been going on, so this is my lengthy catch up post!! At this point i dont remember what has been said and what hasn't, so here goes. My 2nd daughter, Hilary (as close to biological as she could be/my daughter's sister bestie), passed away at age 31, at the beginning of this pandemic on March 6, 2020 from streptoccocus pneumonia. We truly beieve she had Covid but at that time they had no idea what they were dealing with. Just an absolutely beautiful young lady and always wore a smile. Everyone who knew and met her says the same. We have not been able to memorialize her and she is on our minds daily. I couldn't fly to comfort my daughter and that added to my stress. By now I'm already in the gym working on trying to numb the pain from our loss and digging in the yard like crazy...making more garden beds to keep me together. We'll just when you thought it couldn't get any worse and surely not so close together, then my son's father is stricken with COVID two weeks later, in Virginia and was literally fighting for his life for 4 weeks....at this point, I knew that I had to hold my son up as well as my daughter and somehow find enough strength for me to keep going. I knew that I couldn't take another close loss like that and I felt that I was on edge, not being able to find closure for My Hilary. When I tell you, the serious conversations with Me and God about Cherud, were on a constant..in the shower, other places in the bathroom, walking around the house, planting, composting, building fences, cutting grass, etc. I was talking to Cherud subliminally (he was in a medically induced coma..organs were trying to shut down)...longer story short....he walked out of the hospital 3 weeks ago a modern miracle, no meds whatsoever and I suffered major exhaustion/burn out from working out like a mad woman and mental stress, for almost the month in April...still haven't told my kids what happened to me..had just enough umph to tend to the seedlings. Well needless to say, the yarden has changed since lst year and there is so,much more to look at. When I tell you gardening saved my life...i mean every word of it and in return the benefits, hopefully will speak for themselves.