Jokes by Kildale

Discussion in 'Jokes and Games' started by Kildale, Jul 29, 2016.

  1. Droopy

    Droopy Slug Slaughterer Plants Contributor

    Joined:
    Aug 11, 2007
    Messages:
    11,016
    Likes Received:
    1,004
    Location:
    Western Norway
    :smt081 Thanks for the laugh. I needed that!
     
  2. Raddang

    Raddang In Flower

    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2016
    Messages:
    454
    Likes Received:
    616
    Location:
    County of Kent, UK
    I didn't see that coming Kildale. Nice one :like:
     
  3. 2ofus

    2ofus Hardy Maple

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2014
    Messages:
    2,581
    Likes Received:
    1,562
    Location:
    Idaho Mountains
    That was a good one. :like:
     
  4. Islandlife

    Islandlife Young Pine

    Joined:
    Jul 8, 2016
    Messages:
    1,727
    Likes Received:
    1,432
    Cute one! :like:
     



    Advertisement
  5. eileen

    eileen Resident Taxonomist Staff Member Moderator Plants Contributor

    Joined:
    Feb 7, 2005
    Messages:
    27,658
    Likes Received:
    4,035
    Location:
    Scotland
    One of the best yet!!
     
  6. Kildale

    Kildale Nature's Window

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2009
    Messages:
    3,533
    Likes Received:
    4,429
    Location:
    British Columbia
    A hillbilly walked into a hardware store and asked for a saw that would cut down five trees in an hour. The salesman recommended the top-of-the-line chainsaw, so the man bought it. The next day the hillbilly came back in a rage. He held up the chainsaw and said, “You swindled me! This rotten thing only cut down one tree, and it took all day to do it!” The salesman took the chainsaw and started it up to see what was wrong and the hillbilly said, “What’s that noise?”
     
    2ofus likes this.
  7. Islandlife

    Islandlife Young Pine

    Joined:
    Jul 8, 2016
    Messages:
    1,727
    Likes Received:
    1,432
  8. eileen

    eileen Resident Taxonomist Staff Member Moderator Plants Contributor

    Joined:
    Feb 7, 2005
    Messages:
    27,658
    Likes Received:
    4,035
    Location:
    Scotland
  9. Kildale

    Kildale Nature's Window

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2009
    Messages:
    3,533
    Likes Received:
    4,429
    Location:
    British Columbia
    A man asked one of his employees, “Do you believe in life after death?” “Yes, sir,” replied the new employee. “I thought you would,” said the boss. “Yesterday after you left to go to your brother's funeral, he stopped by to see you.”
     
    2ofus likes this.
  10. eileen

    eileen Resident Taxonomist Staff Member Moderator Plants Contributor

    Joined:
    Feb 7, 2005
    Messages:
    27,658
    Likes Received:
    4,035
    Location:
    Scotland
    OOPS!! :chuckle:
     
  11. Islandlife

    Islandlife Young Pine

    Joined:
    Jul 8, 2016
    Messages:
    1,727
    Likes Received:
    1,432
    ohhhhhhhhh noooooooooooo :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes: Ooopssss
     
  12. Kildale

    Kildale Nature's Window

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2009
    Messages:
    3,533
    Likes Received:
    4,429
    Location:
    British Columbia
    A guy was driving his car along a narrow country lane when all of a sudden; a farmer pulls out of a field and onto the road driving a huge tractor. The guy reacts quickly and turns into the field avoiding the tractor. Thinking he was lucky to escape, he turned the car around and went after the farmer. When he stopped the farmer he said “Do you know we nearly had an accident back there”. “Yes” said the farmer, “I just got out of that field in time”.
     
    2ofus and Islandlife like this.
  13. eileen

    eileen Resident Taxonomist Staff Member Moderator Plants Contributor

    Joined:
    Feb 7, 2005
    Messages:
    27,658
    Likes Received:
    4,035
    Location:
    Scotland
    Almost missed this one. I think I know that farmer!!;)
     
  14. Kildale

    Kildale Nature's Window

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2009
    Messages:
    3,533
    Likes Received:
    4,429
    Location:
    British Columbia
    Getting away for quiet weekends, a couple relax in their motor home. But they were frequently disturbed by unwelcome visits from other campers. They devised a plan to give them the privacy that the wanted. Each time they go to the motor home they place a sign on the door: "Insurance agent. Ask about our term-life package."
     
    Islandlife likes this.
  15. 2ofus

    2ofus Hardy Maple

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2014
    Messages:
    2,581
    Likes Received:
    1,562
    Location:
    Idaho Mountains
    That would keep me from knocking on the door! :rofl:
     

Share This Page