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What's That On Your Face?
I was recently reminded of something that happened while we were stationed at Moody Air Force Base in Valdosta, Georgia.
The big event in town was the grand opening of the Home Depot. We waited a few days after the opening so the crowd would die down before we decided to check it out. It must have been just after we moved there because my oldest son was still small enough to carry around. I had him in my arms as we browsed down the aisles.
I walked up to some metal looking, mesh type material to see what it was. It was about eight foot tall and four feet wide and it was positioned so that the tall side was sticking up. Just about the time I got up to it my son reached out and grabbed it. I responded by backing away quickly. He let go, but not before the material started falling toward us. I couldn't get away fast enough and the top edge of it fell right toward my face. It had ridged edges and they managed to scrape across my nose and also a little across my son's arm.
My son got a little scrape, but almost immediately my nose started bleeding profusely. My wife was standing right there and started frantically digging through her purse to find a tissue. Unfortunately, the only thing that she could find absorbent enough to stop the blood was... well, what do most women carry in their purse that could be used to stop bleeding?
She pulled it out, unwrapped it and said, "Here, use this!"
I looked at her with a dumbfounded look, blood streaming down my nose, and said, "I'm not putting that on my face!!!"
"Don't be so stubborn, it's the only thing I have!"
The situation had gotten pretty hectic. My son was still crying because of his scraped arm, my daughter was upset and my wife was close to being in a panic. By now, it was clear that I had been cut three times and the blood was flowing pretty freely. I knew I could never make it to the bathroom on the other side of the store so I reluctantly took it from her hand and placed it on my nose. I did my best to cover it up with the palm of my hand, but it couldn't be done.
We exited the store as fast as possible. I have no idea how many people actually saw what happened and I really don't want to know. I guess the proper thing would have been to tell a manager about it, but I wasn't about to face anyone while holding something like that between my eyes.
Maybe I could have sued Home Depot. I can see the headlines in the paper now, MAN BLAMES HOME DEPOT FOR HAVING TO WEAR A FEMININE PRODUCT. WINS MULTIMILLION DOLLAR SUIT FOR PAIN AND SUFFERING.
Oh, the humanity!
Last edited: Mon Apr 04, 2016 10:31 am
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I would react the exact same way EG :D Good story!
Haha, so funny!
Sometimes life hands us lemons, and sometimes the wife hands us other things.
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